Friend Zone part 2

I'm trying my best to think a good way to just let all of this go. I kind of hate "the friend zone" thing. Is there really a point to having a relationship? Everytime I think about it, I want to be a nun. I've always wanted to be a nun when I was 15. I never thought I would totally look into it. Some people think the only reason why I want to be a nun is because guys kind of ruin my life. True they do (just kidding) but really there's only one love that I know that will never go away. That's the love of God. Love of a friend and family a lover that's all God. I want to give my whole love to the one who gave me reason to live and love others. There is no greater love than God's love. I never really want to have to search for another type of love.

There are so many questions though not everything will be answered. Maybe someting will happen in the end but it's all in God's hands. I choose the path that God has showed me to. Obviously I won't know when will that be but I'm pretty sure he's got something. I'll understand that everything does happen for a reason. Despite all the weird things that happen everyday. Why don't I just let it go? Everything will be fine right?

I was really close in letting my head get in the way of what I love to do best. I perform. That's what I do best. I wanted to get away from my friend so I wouldn't feel stupid but leaving him with no explaination would be stupid. I wanted to perform because I wanted to for me and no one else. I was stupid enough to convince myself that I did it for him. When things happen like that to me, I know I'm lossing it and he's not worth it. He's totally worth it as a good friend though. Scratch the drama with the other people. It's me and him and the music all the way. I like to keep certain friends and he's one of them.